(Bass, Backing Vocals, Obscene Grunting)

"Hey, a bass player is a bass player is a bass player," grunts the low-frequency maestro known only as Cocochunk. "I play one note at a time. It's not that hard. "BUT," he says, his face contorting into a defiant scowl, "not very many bass players can boast of being able to juggle three chainsaws while actually playing the bass on stage."

"Neither can I," he adds. "I'm just saying."

Raised in the Canadian hinterland, this gentle spirit creates the throbbing backbone of the Siòbhan sound, and provides much-needed growling and screaming to the mix. When not on stage, Cocochunk (or "Cocochunk" as he is known to his friends) can be seen sitting alone with his imaginary Oriental girlfriend "Yoko-Chunk", stroking her imaginary thighs and promising to write songs about her. He is fiercely (some might say, ridiculously) patriotic, passionate, and is blessed with a wicked sense of humour and a penis that doesn't curve, either to the left or the right. Has he thought about his good fortune at receiving all of these gifts from his creator? Has he considered that some poor soul may have been deprived of what he was given?

"Yeah," says Cocochunk with a wistful smile. "I'm pretty sure that was Dave."